Thursday, May 23, 2013

Autism and Girlfriends, plus relationships, self confidence

Being a middle school teacher there are obviously a lot of hormones going on and bodies changing etc.  I know personally I deal with mostly males that have Autism, so I can only speak from the male side.  I have parents of students with Autism that come to me and tell me how John Doe has finally wore jeans instead of sweatpants to school because he like Jane Doe.  Now the mother and myself have tried for years for John not to wear sweatpants, but all it took was one love interest and the student is more conscious of what he or she is wearing, thus making a huge step in becoming more mainstreamed.

Then I have other parents that come to me and tell me that their child likes another student, but has no idea how to help the student in establishing a relationship, when the student clams up when speaking to the oposite sex.  I tell the parents that many times to have the student start with Facebook or twitter and just talk to the opposite sex on their to help calm the nerves, thus gradually introducing them to talking to the opposite sex.

These are the types of things we need to look out for as parents, teachers and friends of those with Autism  to try and push them to have more self confidence. The more confidence the student has the more mainstreamed they become.

As always please leave feedback and suggestions for any future post.


  1. My son turned 14 this year so I am very interested in this topic. Recently my son saw this girl and loudly said "she's hot!" He doesn't understand that this is inappropriate to say to a girl and I told him so. He must have learned this from other students. But I'm debating whether to tell him that it's ok to say this when you are hanging out with just the guys --or maybe if you know the girl well enough AND under certain circumstances then MAYBE it's acceptable. This might just make him more confused.

  2. Just my opinion, just tell him that gentleman do not call girls Hot. You can say I like that dress or your hair looks nice today. The problem is kids hear other kids say things and think that it is acceptable, little do they know those kids would not say those things in front of their parents. The less confusing you can be the better off you will be.